The Crumudgeon
by FlowerofAdversity
Summary: I had always wanted to do a crossover of these two and honestly I think it turned out pretty well. Again, we get to see the hideous and frightening Lord Dominator, but she's no match for Rick.
1. Chapter 1

The Crumudgeon

Synopsis: A Wander over Yonder/Rick & Morty crossover. When Rick, Morty and Summer end in the clutches of Dominator, Rick has to inevitably get them out of the pickle they have landed themselves in.

'Sure you can read my mind, but can you keep up with me ?'-Akame, 'The Imperial Arms Dealer'; Akame ga Kill

'We sneak upon their spaceship and blow them all to hell.'-Doc Yewell, Defiance; 'Upon the March We Fittest Die'

'All warfare is based on deception. I got that from Sun Tzu in one of my stupid books.'-Dominion

Chapter 1-In a Tight Spot

It had been an adventure they had _all_ decided on taking together on an impulse over the Labor Day weekend. Summer and Morty had finished their homework and they had all the time in the world to kill to traverse parallel universes. Rick wasn't certain where the portal gun would send them this time, but that was what made the ride worthwhile and entertaining. He had gotten cocky and stumbled when the portal opened, accidentally shoving Summer and Morty inside. With little time to follow his family members, he jumped into his flying car and took chase, not really knowing where they were heading or what had happened. He was still overcoming a monster hangover and the aspirin he had just taken was slow in having any effect.

When Summer and Morty awoke, they were with a fuzzy orange being that was strumming a banjo and had a smile on his face in spite of his circumstances. The other creature was a turquoise colored equine with a magenta mane. Unlike the orange entity, she was very irate at the situation she and her friend were in. Seemed that she and the picker had been in this tight spot once before.

'How could you have gotten yourself so easily distracted ? I can't _believe_ you were lured by Dominator's butterflies ! I tried to warn you but noooooooo !', Sylvia complained.

'Woah, no way. A talking horse !', Summer said, obviously surprised.

'First of all, I'm not _exactly_ a horse, but close enough. I'm Sylvia, and my friend over there playing the banjo _and not listening to one word I am saying_ is Wander.', Sylvia said.

'Who's ship are we in right now ?', Morty stuttered, feeling a bit clausterphobic and helpless.

'Dominator. He's even _worse_ than Lord Hater. That is, if you can believe it. We've tangled once before. I gotta admit, he got me good this time ! He's not lax on his creative deviousness !', Wander said, grinning cheerfully and continuing to play his banjo.

'How did _we_ get tangled up in this mess ?', Summer questioned. Indeed, it was a long story. Dominator had a huge butterfly net she just happened to have in her inventory. In the process of capturing Sylvia and Wander, Summer and Morty had emerged from the other side of Rick's portal gun emission and were caught in the process.

'We're gonna DIE !', Morty said and began confessing every bad thing he had ever done and was repentant for. Summer admitted she was in love with a hipster kid at school that didn't even know that she existed.

'I don't think Hater's going to get us out of this one this time. So, you might be right.', Wander lamented. It wasn't like him to be pessimistic, but he was seeing the whole picture now. Sylvia had never seen Wander cry out of helplessness before, but there was a first time for everything. Uncertain of what to do, she held her friend close and ran her fingers through his lush, orange coat while he sobbed pitifully.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2-Not Today Death !

Dominator was savoring her victory and revelling in how simple it had been to lure Wander into her clutches. Unlike their last meeting, she had decided to destroy him and Sylvia slowly, torturing them until they died of their nerves being overstimulated by agony.

Even though Wander was bawling and Sylvia did her best to keep her eyes dry, she wasn't one to hold back her woeful cries of fear. Even though she was tough as nails, she wasn't so stoic that she wouldn't allow herself to emote in such a way. Crying with a friend nearby made the experience a bit easier, even though she was fairly certain that she, Wander, and these poor humans from another Universe would die within a few more hours.

Suddenly, there came a loud _boom_ into the huge warship.

'When did Grandpa Rick install lasers in his flying car ?', Morty questioned.

'So I tinker when you're not looking ! What else is new ?', Rick answered, wisking them all away. Dominator had sent her watchdogs after him but he thwarted them at every turn. Even her largest death ray watchdog was no match for the megapowered laser guns on the newly souped up car.

Rick was able to warp away, open a new portal and find themselves right back at home in their garage where they had begun their so called 'usual' day. However, he had forgotten that Wander and Sylvia hadn't been left behind and tagged along with them.

'Damn it all to f #%ing hell !', Rick swore as soon as the realization dawned on him. It was going to be a long day.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3-Put a Little Love In Your Heart

Wander felt so gleeful that he couldn't help but dance and sing. He even went so far as to hug Rick for having rescued him.

'Man oh man, I thought we were a gonner ! I mean, golly ! We were done for, and you just swooped in there and kablooey !', Wander said, hugging his new best friend. Rick was definitely _not_ amused. Sylvia tried to stop herself from sniggering but seeing Wander hug this new cranky stranger amused her more than Wander's antics with Lord Hater.

'I have to put you back where you and your horse came from.', Rick said, rubbing his temples. The throbbing hangover had come back. A little Alkaseltzer calmed it down and this time, removed it for good.

'I want to pay you back for what you've done. Is there anything I can do, anything at all ?', Wander asked.

'Stop hugging me for one.', Rick said, obviously annoyed. In essense, though, he didn't mind the adorable, friendly alien vagabond embracing him.

'No problema !', Wander complied, smiling widely at the mad scientist. Rick simply groaned.

'We have to keep them a secret from mom and dad. Should be no problem seeing that they're out on a grocery run and other errands. No time specified as to when they would be back.', Summer mentioned.

'Thank our lucky friggin stars.', Rick said, shaking his head again. It was then that Rick's stomach growled. Not really asking for permission, Wander whipped them up a gourmet meal and set it before them.

'Bon appetite.', he said, bowing formerly. Rick wasn't one to turn down a meal, especially one that was prepared so lavishly.

'Fine, but after we eat, you and your steed are going back home.', Rick said. Wander nearly hugged him again but thought better of it in the long run.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4-I Hate Long Goodbyes

Summer and Morty had to burn laundry scented candles to mask the scent of an Italian dinner that would put any Buca di Beppo to shame. Morty could hear the distant rumble of a car motor.

'Shoot ! I think mom and dad are back home...we'd better get Wander and Sylvia out of here, now !', Morty said.

'Shit, Morty, I know what I'm doing. Calm the hell down.', Rick said. His coarse tone had immediately put Morty at ease. Summer, strangely, had remained calm throughout this whole ordeal. Even during the execution in Lord Dominator's ship, she hadn't even shed one tear. Wander didn't want to say goodbye to his new friends and was reluctant to leave Earth, even though he longed to continue traveling the Universe and seeing everything he could as long as he lived.

'I hate long goodbyes.', Wander said, with a slight trace of tears in his eyes. He wanted to give Rick and his friends one last embrace before departing. Begrudgingly, Rick allowed him to do so and without Morty or Summer noticing, snuck in a kiss to Wander's forehead. He had learned that in all instances, love itself was a transcendent element and indeed, it healed all wounds and was the elixir of existence itself.


	5. Chapter 5

Epilogue

Wander added a noogie with a bounding leap before Rick discharged his portal gun. Wander dipped his bubble wand into his soapy solution and flicked a bubble around them, waving as they departed. All this happened before Beth and Jerry had returned from their errands, getting full help from Summer and Morty. Rick even lent a hand putting things away but not out of compulsion. He did so because he wanted to. Jerry nearly noticed the 'tricked out' version of the new car but waved it off, thinking no further on the topic. He knew his father-in-law liked to tinker and left it at that.

That evening, the group played an impromptu game of badmitton before indulging in ice cream and calling it a night. After settling in bed, Rick felt a sense of accomplisment and joy (even though he didn't admit it to anyone else but himself). Meeting Wander, strangely, had made him an even better human being. He had opened himself up to being more compassionate, but not to the point of being manhandled. He was still a tough cookie and a crumudgeon through and through, but unconditional love was one constant that the Universe would always reveal to him in ways he never knew possible or probable. That's what made the adventure and peril entertaining.

The End


End file.
